[captainidiot]

Not Exactly Golf, but worth a laugh. 8)

A couple attending an art exhibition at the National Gallery were staring at
a portrait that had them completely confused. The painting depicted three
very black and totally naked men sitting on a park bench. Two of the
figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis. The
curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting
the painting and offered his assessment. He went on for nearly half an hour
explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of African-Americans in a
predominately white, patriarchal society. "In fact," he pointed out, "some
serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and
sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society."
After the curator left, a Scottish man approached the couple and said,
"Would you like to know what the painting is really about?"
"Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the
gallery?" asked the couple.
"Because I'm the guy who painted it," he replied. "In fact, there are no
African-Americans depicted at all. They're just three Scottish coal-miners.
The only difference is that the guy in the middle went home for lunch."
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A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed sex obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly.
"In this Country, we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives...... "
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."